so fickle

I’m sure if you watched the news at all today you realized, like I did, that it’s been a year since haiti was severely devastated.  I remember a short year ago being glued to the tv screen watching glimpses of what was going on.  I remember my heart being so heavy for the people who were searching for their loved ones.  I remember being moved to tears at the images of bodies in the street.  I vowed to pray for these people.  For Haiti.  For God to move there in ways beyond what I could even imagine.

That was one year ago.

Approximately 11 months and one week after I had all of the above feelings I completely forgot about Haiti.  The stories I had heard left my mind.  The heaviness in my heart was long gone.  I stopped praying.

My heart is so fickle. I feel moved to something and as quickly as it comes into my life, it’s forgotten.  As I saw the images on the news again this morning all I could think was, “oh crap.  I did it again.  I totally forgot about the world out there because I am so completely consumed with my own little realm of it.

I get so frustrated with my heart and its fickle tendencies.

But I do relate a little bit more to passages like Romans 7:15,

For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.

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