My friend first and then sister-in-law, Angela and I have been talking about addictions lately. Awhile back I read a great book called Addictions: A Banquet in the Grave – Finding Hope in the Power of the Gospel which gave me a new outlook on addictions, why we have them and the power they have over our lives. Angela also read a book on addictions – I can’t remember the title but it said that most people, at any given time in their life, usually have at least 14 things that they are addicted to.
Now, I wasn’t thinking about any of that this last monday morning when I woke up and was lying in bed and had the thought, “I don’t want coffee this morning.” I know!! I shocked myself.
I went that day not having any and didn’t even get a headache. Shock number 2! And every morning since I haven’t even had the slightest bit of a craving for it. So it’s not like I’m depriving myself of something – I just don’t even want it.
I’ve noticed a few things since not having it though.
1. I was always grumpy in the morning and didn’t want to talk or even attempt happiness until I had my coffee. Turns out that was just a state of mind – I’m fine without it. I even asked Earl if he thought I needed it and he said no!
2. I feel more even. Without relying on that coffee for my morning happiness I feel like I’m more balanced.
3. I’ve realized the power I was giving to coffee. It affected my emotions and mood a huge amount and that’s really not okay. I feel much better not allowing a drink to determine how I feel.
4. I wonder if I’m ever going to want it again. For now I don’t. But it’s weird. Cause I LOVED coffee. So what makes one not crave something that the morning before they did? Only answer I have it God. He’s shown me that my joy does not come in liquid form, nor can I blame my emotions on a lack of it. My joy comes from Him alone and coffee was robbing Him of that glory. Isn’t that lame? For years I have thanked coffee for my morning happiness instead of the true giver of it. No longer, I tell you!
Thank-you Jesus for so easily taking away my craving for coffee and teaching me about you through it all. Sorry Starbucks! You no longer rule my mornings!
Now to find the other 13 things I’m addicted to and kick them to the curb….